Thursday, January 03, 2008

Is it over yet?

We had a great time ringin' in the New Year; a lovely dinner and a lovely evening with great friends. My single chug of Rattlesnake (as opposed to a big styrofoam coffee cup full) still just almost made me want to get sick though... I'm sure that had something to do with the two scoops of cheese dip and most of a bag of tortilla chips that I had along with that lovely dinner, since I was near full-enough-to-puke before I had that little shooter.

After making it home safely but seriously tired somewhere around three AM, I slept well, and then things kinda went straight to hell.

New Year's Day was cold but fairly reasonable and as we were about to leave and go to dinner in Jenks, Clay discovered the first Parakeet Egg. I figured I'd call My Mom and tell her about it while I was waiting for the car to warm up, but my phone battery was dead and the charger wouldn't work. After smacking things around a bit, I discovered there was a penny in the cigarette lighter. Apparently tossing change into the ashtray while the lighter itself was not in that hole was not such a good idea. Whups. I remember having to fish a Juicy Fruit wrapper out of the lighter in the truck I had in highschool and what a big smoky smelly mess that was; I was not lookin' forward to poking things down in there to get the penny out, but I needed my phone...

With a knife, a pair of tweezers, and two ink pens, I finally got the penny out and tossed it somewhere in the car, I have no clue where, and the act of tossing did not release any of my irritable energy. After all that, the charger still wouldn't power up. After a few more seconds of smackin' things around, I decided I'd better just leave it alone before I got any madder, so I hung the charger back over the console where it belongs, and I dropped the phone between my knees and into my purse, which was on the floor in front of the driver's seat. Well, I thought I dropped it into my purse.

We had a nice time at the restaurant, the tortilla soup was wonderful enough to make up for the mediocre chicken enchilada. We headed home, where I figured I'd better plug my phone into the MacBook and charge it up, since I didn't have any way to charge it in the car -- but the phone was not in my purse. No big deal, I'll just run back out to the car and get it, it must be on the floor or in that cavernous abyss down between the seat and the console.

The total-stranger-filth that surely inhabits that cavernous abyss still kinda scares me; I've vacuumed quite a bit, but I know that the Shop-Vac nozzle (same as my hand) doesn't really fit all the way into that space, so it's probably not able to get all the dreck out.

I thrashed about all through the Mark 8, front and back, and tried to look under the seats and in all the possible gaps and spaces from just about every angle I possibly could, and even as I hung upside-down pulling all sorts of things out from under that seat, I could feel the frustration creeping in deeper and deeper. I found napkins and kleenex, more tree-shaped air fresheners, beer bottle lids, pop bottle lids, to-go-cup lids of every size, coins, the actual factory cigarette lighter, a small bowl (it's blue), a couple more ink pens, a trailer hitch pin, and even an iPod case. I found everything but my cell phone.

Still fighting the frustration, I went inside and dumped my entire purse on Clay's bed, and then dialed my number just in case it might still have enough battery left to make a little noise. No luck, straight to voicemail. I checked the car one more time, with a flashlight, and still nothing. I headed back inside thinkin' I'd find a phone book and call the restaruant, since the parking lot was the only place it might be, but neither of us is particularly neat and/or organized, so it wasn't all that easy to just pick up a phone book. I decided to dial my number one more time just in case someone had picked it up and got it to come on for just a little while longer.

Someone answered. She said she'd taken it home to Glenpool to plug it into her charger because she wasn't sure how long it had been out in the parking lot, and that she was looking through the phone book and trying to decide which number to call about getting it back to me. When she gave me directions to her house, she finished off with "red truck and silver car," and sure enough, it was the same silver Toyota Yaris that we'd noticed in the parking lot as we left. She was a real sweetie, and I just hope and pray she only looked through the phone book and not through the pictures.

My phone had apparently been mashed open; possibly under a shoe, possibly under a car tire. It has some deep scratches in the hinge and the snappy plastic cover is broken, which is probably what saved it from being completely mashed to pieces. It was bent and didn't seem to close up quite right, so I tried to bend it back and the screen went blank. When it finally came back on, it was close enough to straight I decided to just leave it alone.

Last night after dinner, I discovered my Bluetooth Hands-Free was missing. I thrashed the car again, checked the ground where I'd got out and back in, and I even went back to the church to check beside where I'd parked there, but I didn't find it. I was really feelin' like a scumbag for losing one of the coolest Christmas gifts of this year, and tryin' to figure out a graceful way out of my situation, and then my phone kept cuttin' out and adding to the irritation factor. I still have not forgotten the 5100 series Nokia that I bashed to pieces against the steering wheel of the sky blue '98 F-250; and I could feel I was getting dangerously close to that point last night when I got home...

I was very thankful to find my Bluetooth Hands-Free under the passenger seat (I have no idea how it got from my purse to there), but I'm very glad to have it back.

This morning when I got ready to leave for work I discovered that my driver's door had spent the night about a half-inch short of latched.

Just a minute ago, while I was typing this post, my sleeve hung on something and I realized there's a splintery shred of MacBook that has opened up a gap just under my right wrist.

Should I just put my purse, iPod, phone, computer, contact lenses, glasses, good watch, camera, SD cards, and flash drives in a box and put it in the top of my closet so nothing important or expensive gets lost or damaged while I just stay in bed for a couple days 'til whatever this is all blows over?

Is it over yet?

Is it over yet?

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