A Year Ago Today...

A year ago today was a Sunday... I slept late, barely made it to church in Owasso, and spent the afternoon with my Mom & Dad. We had lunch, we visited a couple cemetaries, and we drove around a bit. It was a nice afternoon even though not anything particularly memorable happened.

The reason I remember that Sunday is because I was achy & sore from the bleachers and also just a little wore-out from being out so late the night before. When I finally came into the house that Saturday night (okay, actually Sunday morning), the clock on the oven said "3:51 AM." I remember thinkin' we'd really hit it off, and surely a first date that lasts ten hours has to mean there's something there.

The MLRA Late Models (and Pure & Factory Stocks) put on a pretty cool show at Salina and we had a nice time flirting and sharing cheese fries. He didn't jump when I reached for his hair, I didn't gasp when he dropped the F-bomb; we had a very lovely evening. I'm not sure what time we got back to my house -- we sat in the truck a few minutes and then went to the tailgate. I remember seeing the moon just over the top of the house when I sat down; we talked for a long time without ever getting bored with each other, and then the moon was way, waaaaaay up high in the sky when we finally called it a night. 3:51 AM.

And a whole lot of things have changed around here since...

Happy Anniversary, Baby!! :)

The Day After Hump-Day...

Looks cloudy out there, we could use a little rain to cool this place off. Knowin' Oklahoma though, it would either be just enough to make it steamy or so much we have to get out the tarps to keep it off the computers.

--

My "Wax Job" is starting to grow back in a bit, but it's not really visible, only feelable. Is "feelable" a word?? Anyhow, I look good enough to wear shorts, but I can feel just a little bit of it comin' back in. All-in-all, I think I'm happy with the deal; even though I'm not sure when I'll get around to doin' it again. As nice as it is, it did hurt a bit -- but it was certainly easier to deal with than razor burn & chlorinated pool water.

--

What happened to The Mirror Project??? I tried yesterday and today, and it's gone! I sure hope it hasn't completely disappeared; I just took a new picture yesterday when they brought Grandma's Car in.

--

Speakin' of Grandma's Car, yeah, it's here. I dunno, might be a total, might not. From what I can see without tearin' into anything, to an Insurance Company it's probably a total; to a Salvage Yard, it just might be a fixer if somebody was willing to put the effort in. I'm thinkin' that if the wreck was the other car's fault, the insurance company will probably have to just buy it -- if it was "The Massage Therapist"s fault, we'll probably have to fix it back so her lousy no-drivin' azs will have transportation.

Even though there's still no word on whose fault it was, my money's on TMT. You can look at the car and tell she's just not careful with it. If she was careful with it, it wouldn't have the handle ripped off the glovebox and it wouldn't have the speaker grilles bashed in. If she gave a d@mn about it, she wouldn't have left that broken mirror swingin' and rubbin' the paint off the door -- geez, how hard is it to get some tape and wrap it up to keep from just hangin' down there?

Nothing survives unscathed, nothing is safe from TMT, not even the Little Smiley Valve Stem Lid Guy...



Now what the he11 did Little Smiley Valve Stem Lid Guy ever do to TMT? What? Little Smiley Valve Stem Lid Guy ain't never done no wrong by nobody, and now he's lost an eye because of TMT's careless disregard! It's all fun and games 'til somebody loses an eye!

--

Wow, I was turnin' into a nut-job there for a minute, wasn't I?

Okay, I'll quit it...

More later. _\,,/

Here's One For My Grandma...

Maybe I'm too sentimental, but I got just a little bit concerned when I found out "The Massage Therapist" was gettin' Grandma's Contour.

No, no, no, I don't have some crazy thing about Massage Therapists -- that was just the easiest thing to call her without givin' her a name on here.

I'll be the first to admit, I'm "Car Sentimental." I Love that Bandit TA, I want that Pantera back, It's tearin' me up to see the Triumph with a For Sale Sign on it. Black Ranger Pickups and Red Suzuki Samurai's make me smile with memories. Red half-ton Fords and White Geo Metro's make me check to see if I've still got my seatbelt on. There are parts in my Orange Twenty that came out of my First Outlaw Stock; and it's on my mind at least a little bit every time I climb in. Sentimental and race cars? You bet -- This Orange car is the last one we've got around here that Dave actually had his hands on; I remember him diggin' through it while I was strippin' out the Blue Cutlass Supreme, and I still have the "Men In Black" toy "Memory Blinky Thingy" that he found in the glovebox & I later found when I cleaned out his ol' Van... I am full-on Car Sentimental, without a doubt; "Vincent Black Lightning, 1952" made me cry and I saw "Maximum Overdrive" a little more eye-to-eye than most people did.

Deep down in my lifetime-in-the-car-biz-heart, I know that a '96 Ford Contour four-cylinder really isn't anything special, even if it did come in one of the better colors of that year. It wasn't any kind of hotrod, not particularly fun to drive, but it was a decent car; just a regular little ol' Grandma's car, creature comforts but not a house-of-power. We bought it fender-bendered -- I remember pickin' it up to take it to the glass shop and hoping the sprinkles wouldn't turn to rain before I could get there with no wipers and no smooth glass for 'em to wipe off anyway. I remember driving it up here from Sand Springs when we moved Grandma in with Dad; and I remember runnin' around with my Grandma, and even if it was a Dr. Appointment or a trip to the Pharmacy, my Grandma always managed to get in a little shopping and a nice little lunch afterward. I remember driving out on 412 and chatting with My Grandma about the wedding; and I especially remember that because she was the only member of my family who was excited about the idea -- but that's a whole 'nuther fit to pitch...

So... Over the last few years, we've watched TMT trash, thrash, crash, abuse and use up a lot of cars. It's like she's never managed to outgrow the new-driver-highschool-kid-stupidity -- I know it takes some people longer than others, but come on, once you're past thirty you should either learn to drive or give it up and learn to use the public transit system. I cringed when I heard about TIB blowin' the head gasket; I cringed a little more when I found out TMT had killed another car and just "had to have something," so they set her up with Grandma's car and a payment plan.

She ran the PikePass lane first thing, like before she'd even had it a whole week we got the letter with the lovely photo and the PikePass Fine. She had a claim filed against her for knocking mirrors with somebody downtown. And now she's had a fairly serious crash that sent two people to the hospital. I know what some folks would be thinking right now -- I had a very serious crash that sent somebody to the funeral home -- but that was ten years ago, and that was the only wreck I ever caused, I had insurance to cover it and a savings account to cover the rest. We've watched this girl crash cars, burn up motors and transmissions and countless stacks of parts; we've watched her drive 'em into the ground 'til they won't go any more and then have to keep 'em sittin' around 'cause she wasn't finished with the payments yet. And now we're dealin' with her crashing this car while it's still got our insurance on it -- I know, "not a good idea," but it was a "helping a friend out" kinda deal.


Stress can kill people; just ask the Mounds School Board what happened at their meeting last night. I'd really think that someone who is a "Massage Therapist" would know about that; but maybe she doesn't. I'm having a hard time watching My Dad deal with the stress of all these phone calls from Insurance Agents and Lawyers and God-knows-who-else. Yeah, I know, he's My Dad, I've stressed him out like that myself too; but it was one wreck ten years ago and his kid has had time to outgrow the stupid-driver phase and not do it again. Now there's somebody else's kid layin' the stress on, and it's not doin' any of us any good.

I'd love to meet this chick... I'd totally give her a piece of my mind, and if she got mouthy with me about it, I'd rip a piece out of her azs to take home to my folks.

End Of Rant...

More Later. _\,,/

Public Service Announcement...

'Cause if it wasn't a warning to others, it would just be a whiny fit.

Thursday after dinner, my ear started feelin' achy & swollen -- like it used to get if I was in the water too much way back in junior-high. Friday Morning, it was even worse, so I called the little ol' Small Town Family Doctor's Office and was lucky enough to get an eleven-thirty appointment.

Now, I've had some "Bad Experiences" with this Dr. before, but I figured that even though I'm completely happy with my Women's Specialties Doctor, I can't just go callin' her for earaches... So, off I went to STFD to get it taken care of, 'cause it hurts. It feels like it's huge, it hurts to touch it, my voice sounds funny, and I can hear every time my teeth touch or every time my collar touches my neck... I usually have a pretty decent tolerance for pain & just waitin' for it to pass, but it hurts. It. Really. Feckin'. Hurts.

Quick visit with STFD, he looks, says "Yup, it's swollen in there," tells me he's had several people with swimming pool-related ear problems since it's been so hot lately, and he whips out the prescription paper. Before he starts writing, I remind him that I don't have prescription coverage; in hopes that he'll get me some samples outta the office to keep it on the cheap. Since he started writing anyway, I asked him if it was going to be very expensive -- and he says no. He says it shouldn't be too bad. Antibiotic Drops & Pain Pills, he says they can get me generic and it won't be bad at all.

The Pharmacist asks if I've ever taken Tramadol (Hello, Google Users, Thanks for stoppin' by!) before and tells me it's "new" and that it probably won't have any ill effects but to take it with food just in case.

I get to the checkout and it's sixty five dollars.

Sixty Five Dollars. "Won't be bad at all" my ass. Oh well, STFD's done it to me before -- like when he wanted to send me for that ultrasound that was supposed to be "Around a hundred and fifty bucks or so, not bad at all," and I had to cancel when they said "$794 up-front." I figured I could save what I didn't take for my ear and that way I'd have some good prescription pain pills for the next time I'm havin' hell with that tooth...

I took the first dose of ear drops and then finished out the day at work with Tylenol, 'cause hey, if Tramadol is over two dollars a pill, it's bound to be some high-powered-good-sh!t that just might knock me on my azs -- so I ain't poppin' one 'til I don't have to drive anywhere.

Clay and I had dinner at The Minuteman just as the Tylenol was wearing off again and I was really starting to hurt. I took a Tramadol halfway in the middle of my dinner and by the time we were halfway back to the house, I was really draggin' my own tracks out. I had just about enough time to get my shoes off and my contacts out when I started feelin' really bad. I had just enough time to let the second dose of ear drops soak in before I started feelin' really anxious and couldn't lay on my side anymore. Chills, shaking, anxious-panic-ish feeling, freezing cold chills... And Hey, My Ear Still Hurts.

Sixty Five Dollars plus tax. I'm sick. I'm still hurting. And I'm P!ssed 'cause I could have spent sixty five dollars on something that would have had a better chance of killing pain without killing me. But oh, "it won't be too bad." Feckin' STFD is a D-!-c-k and that's all I know to say about that. Seriously, it sucks 'cause there's not anything anybody can do with prescription drugs -- Can't take 'em back to the Pharmacy even if it is Wal-Mart, can't Ebay 'em, can't CraigsList 'em, can't (legally) sell 'em off to somebody else; I'm just stuck with 'em.

And when the bill comes, I'm not gonna mail a check -- I'm gonna carry it into the office with the twenty-nine Tramadol's that I paid cash for but cannot use, and I'll count out enough of 'em at two-dollars-and-thirty-five-point-one-cents-per-pill to cover whatever my "80/20" insurance doesn't pay.

Unless I can horse-trade 'em for some Phillips B-32... ;) heh heh heh...

Myspacepissedmeoff!!! Grrr!!!

Friggin' MySpace... I thought I'd have a little fun with that whole "Ten Years Ago" C&P bulletin thing, so I pasted it in, I answered all the questions, and I had fun with it like I always do. I clicked "Post" and it went to a screen that said they were "taking bulletins down for a few hours" for repairs or some BS like that.

There's no clicking "back" and no way to get back all the answers I'd just typed.

Gone.

Freakin' Gone.

"My Mom Says..."

So, I'm sittin' here at the PC this morning, waitin' for the phones to ring and havin' my morning dose of canned caffine...

My Mom walks up to me (oh, the magic of workin' with family) and puts on the fancy-face and says, "I hope that when you are dining out you do not turn up the chip bag to get the last of the crumbs or tilt your head back to slurp the last of the 'Dew out of the can..."

I didn't quite know what to say to that, seein' as how we never get to go out anywhere for lunch anymore, not even to go home and eat or go run an errand or two on a lunch break. Most days it's something that's brought back here (usually by me) and we all eat at the counter while answering phones and dealing with the public in between bites of hamburger or sub sandwich (hence the bags of chips and cans of pop).

"My Dining Out does not involve drinks that come in cans or chips that come in bags, so I don't think there's much to be concerned about there."

Boy did I ever get a dirty look for that one...

I'm just not a girly-girl; if I was, I probably wouldn't be selling car parts or doing any other job that involves the shirtless/unwashed retail public. Don't get me wrong; I am versatile, I can dress up and be "the nice girl" when it's called for; like the occasional "Church" service or dinner with The Hunny's family or a nice evening out -- but at work, I'm just one of the guys.

I'm sittin' here sweatin' my azs off in my rough ol' jeans and a T-shirt from the '02 Knoxville Nationals (no, I didn't go, it was a left-over that I got as a door prize at a trade show where I was actin' polite while dressed-to-impress in my khakis & polo shirt); I'm plopped on my ass behind the counter in a salvage yard -- I'm friendly and decent on the phone, I'm polite to the walk-in public, I'm even nice enough not to yell and b!tch when some smelly ol' dip comes in here and stands in front of the fan with his exposed pits flappin' in the breeze and stinkin' up the place. How I get the last few crumbs out of my 99-cent bag of Ruffles isn't too big of a deal, is it?

If I'm all dressed up with perfect hair and makeup and all the full-on girliness, chances are I won't be going any place where the drinks are served in cans; but workin' here with no air conditioning and no real lunch break, slurpin' the last of my money's worth out of the can of 'Dew isn't too big of a deal, is it?

I get a kick outta bein' here, I like the people-watching even if some of 'em are a little irritating. I love messin' with cars, I love bein' able to take care of the race car when things are slow around here. But my next job will be air-conditioned, with real lunch breaks, and hopefully without mosquitos so I can use my CK instead of Off.

More later... _\,,/

Big Deer. Really, Really Big Deer.

I know that PodCasts and DialUp really don't mix, but I've been doin' the MP3 player thing a lot more since I got that SD Card Player. As a Mac Nerd, you can bet I'd Loooooove an iPod, but I'm just too tight to go buy one just yet -- same as I'd probably really like DSL, but I'm a cheapskate. I do like my cheap little $24 SD Card MP3 player though; it's tiny enough to just drop in my purse (My Rio seems kinda big) and it holds more music than my Rio too. I like being able to use those SD cards for whatever I need to use 'em for -- The Camera, the MP3 Player, Transferring files back & forth between the iBook and the PC...

So, through NPR's website, I found a little PodCast that I've been downloading to listen to when I get bored with the actual radio. "Love And Radio" reminds me a little of "This American Life," and the episode I just finished was fascinating. If you're interested in that kinda thing, check out loveandradio.org and listen to the one about Ghost Stories -- the last story at the end, the one with the kitchen cabinet and "Help Me" just really pulled me in.

Maybe that's why I had such a strange string of dreams last night... Or maybe it's the heat. Or maybe it was something I ate. Maybe it's all the different lot cars I've been runnin' around in. Or maybe it's 'cause I was watching "Sex And The City" before I went to bed.

Anyhow...

It started out with me hangin' out with a couple of my friends (Congrats on the New Baby, Y'all!), at their house, (something I have done, but not a lot) and we were going to go somewhere, like to some store or something, I'm not sure. Then we ended up at a gathering of people, almost like a church service, but not really; and Dave was there with another woman. This struck me a bit odd, but I wasn't completely mad, just a little irritated; so I approached them and he sent her away for a bit to talk to me. He was warm and loving, but as soon as she came back, he was cold and distant again, almost like he barely knew me. As I turned to walk away, someone grabbed me and held me, and it was just what I needed... I couldn't see a face or identify the person, but I'm sure it was Clay 'cause it just felt that way, I laid my head on his chest and he held me for a while and it just felt like it was him, it was where I wanted to be, it was just right. I had to leave (not sure where I was going) and so I headed for the car; walking out across a tiled floor, and I could hear the sound of my footsteps very distinctly as I walked (like maybe cowboy boots?) Somehow, the gathering of people I'd been in earlier was now more like a diner, with booths that had shiny black seats and shiny chrome trim and only a few people sitting around. The row of three or four parked cars was in amongst the tables, so I went around behind the car to make sure I had enough room to back out. It was a big black convertible with the top already down, I'm not sure what it was, but it belonged to My Dad, so I'm sure it was a Ford product of some type (older, like fifties or so, and Biiiiig). I thought to myself as I was backing out that it seemed odd that Dad would let me take it, but that at least I wasn't sneakin' it out this time like I had done with the other one (yeah, dream-thoughts, I've never snuck a car out, never). I backed out carefully so I wouldn't hit any of the other cars or any of the tables, and then I was making my way through a parking lot at dusk. I heard some people yelling and then there were lots of Deer, big ones, small ones, little spotted Bambi-lookin' ones, just running all through the parking lot, across in front of me and beside me. I slowed down to a crawl to make sure I didn't hit any of them, and the car was strangely difficult to deal with, like it didn't want to stop completely, so I was trying to shift it out of "drive" and into "neutral" and the gearshift got all funky. I settled for a slow crawl and was just trying not to hit any of the deer when I saw the man with the gun. It was a guy we'd sold a transmission to (really) a couple weeks ago, and he recognized me from seeing me at the shop. He saw that I was getting a little anxious about the whole deer situation (much like my "Dog Anxiety" issue) and said he was trying to take care of the problem. I'd got the car almost stopped and was talking to him when a few of the deer started coming toward the car. One really huuuuuge deer came up to the front of the car, and I was worried that it was going to do that whole rub-n-lean thing like those d@mn cows did to my F-250. It came right up to the front of the car and leaned over the windshield, it was huge, as in bigger than a horse, it had mean-lookin' eyes, and it was leaning and reaching over the windhshield and into the car and trying to nibble on my right wrist. The man was going to shoot it, but he said it was too close to me and to the car, and I was just "paralyzed with fear" and it was gnawing at my wrist as I woke up.

When I woke up, I'm pretty sure I was in exactly the same position I fell asleep in and I hadn't moved at all. I didn't check the time.

I know, I know, nobody wants to read about anybody else's dreams... Or do they? Anyway, I'm not going to make a habit of that, I just wanted to get it outta my head before I forgot.

More later... _\,,/

But I Didn't Yell It At Any Junior-High Girls...

Not too bad of a weekend even though it wasn't the best... Last week's tire-measurement change certainly helped, and the track was beautiful -- it's been a long long time since we've had one stay moist through the features. The Heat race was nice and the car felt good 'til I lost the rear tire on the other side... Yeah, it sucks to not be able to finish, but it happens every now and then.

The 'Bago's maiden voyage was less-than-stellar, but at least we made it there and made it back home. Apparently it has a few electrical problems, and there's a possibility everything electrical is interconnected. All these years I've just kinda figured that those Ford E4OD transmissions had their own computer stuff possibly connected to the main ECM, but I'da never dreamed the same "Gremlins" would effect the everything from Brake Lights and Blinkers to Rear Cabin Heat & Air to the E4OD trans all at once, all at the same time.

On the way up, we closed the walk-through and I sat in the middle up front for the sake of air conditioning; on the way home, I figured it wouldn't be as hot in the dark with a little air moving, and I could stretch my sweaty self out on the couch and nap a bit. Once I'd managed to prop open the windows in the curb-side door and the two back bumper doors, there was a pretty good bit of air moving through and it was alright back there.

I kicked off my shoes and stretched out on the couch, and after I'd called Mom to say we were headed back, I tossed my phone in my purse and didn't think too much more about it. I had to get up a time or two and re-prop the windows that kept fallin' down, and a time or two I saw a flash up toward the front of the left wall. I tried to look around and see where headlights of oncoming cars would reflect, I thought it might be my phone, I thought it might be a seatbelt buckle swingin' around and catching the light...

When I felt a little bit of a swerve, I went to the rear-facing seat to lean into the walk-through and see if everything was okay up front -- and when I sat down, I heard a few little cracks & pops. Not reflections, not phone blinks, honest-to-God electrical pops, the stuff house fires are made of. That mass of wires where they pulled out the rear cabin control panel was gettin' bounced around enough to throw off a few sparks, and I even though I wasn't thrilled to hear that the ol' 7.3 had lost oil pressure, I was glad we were stopping 'cause I wasn't about to reach in there in the dark and try to stop the wires from touching.

We stopped in Nowata to hunt up some oil and about the time we got off the highway and into a parking lot, the sparks stopped. In all the running around trying to find a flashlight and some oil, I leaned back in the curb-side door and was a little puzled to hear a fan running. The rear cabin air unit had came on. Well, not air, but heat. Yeah, nice, huh? Once we were moving again, even though the OD light was flashing (which usually means the E4OD trans has a problem, like a fuse or somethin' like that), thankfully, the sparks had stopped. The open windows were enough to outdo the heater as long as I sat in the right spot, so it wasn't too bad.

As we came into the edge of Skiatook, the heater stopped and the sparks came back.

Well, at least we made it there and made it back.

I still think the 'Bago will be a pretty sweet deal once we get the bugs worked out. If we can figure out somethin' for that control panel and maybe help out it's tired ol' diesel, it'll make a nifty pullin' rig.

About That Title...

A while back, quite a while, before I got away from that d@mn message board; I let somebody have it for yelling at a couple girls under the pressbox. I figured if I was gonna catch heII for something I did in the dark in the pits after the races (see earlier post), I wasn't about to let somebody get by with pullin' sh!t under the lights in the middle of the crowd during the Outlaw A.

I'm 5'6" give-or-take a quarter, I'm not particularly tall but not particularly short. The girls I saw him yelling at were about shoulder-high to me, give-or-take a bit, so I'm sure they were junior-high age or younger; and he was probably forty-some (throwin' a guess there) and he was the flagman at another track. Screaming "____ ____ SUCKS!!!" at anybody is a little unprofessional for a flagman even when he's not working, and screaming "____ ____ SUCKS!!!" at kids is just gunky no matter who's doin' it. He tried to say it was ____ ____'s wife that he was yelling at, but I still just don't really think that could be true -- Elvis believed in findin' 'em young, but I don't think ____ ____ is married to anybody that young. Whether or not ____ ____ actually did suck was not my issue; he raced in a different class from me, I hadn't been on the track with him, at the time, I didn't care if he sucked or not...

But I'm sayin' it now, "____ ____ SUCKS!!!"

If you're faster, fine, come around -- but if you're faster, you should be skilled enough to come around without smashing everything close to you. If it's Fast, you don't have to make it Wide. If you're comin' around, come on around and go on, there's not any need to cut it down on me and make me have to slam the brakes to keep from knocking you into the infield.

I don't want to be that one car that nobody trusts 'cause it's always outta control. When he came down on me, I let out to keep from spinning anybody out, because hey, You have to "Be Respectable" to earn any respect from anybody -- and bashing somebody just 'cause they're there just doesn't seem very Respectable, does it?

Apparently he got sent to the back for other reasons, and had the opportunity to come around me again... Now, I'm not goin' into who's legal and who's not, that's a whole 'nuther fit to pitch and I'm sure y'all have already figured out he's probably not runnin' legal; but like I said before, If you're faster, be Faster, not wider, not rougher, not nastier. Like Mel the cook on "Alice" says, "The Best Defense Is A Good Offense." If it's fast, you don't have to drive it wide to keep anybody from gettin' around you.

I let out when he came down half-sideways in front of me 'cause I'm tryin' to be decent and respectable, I did not spin him to the infield even though I had a bulls-eye chance; and then the next chance he got, he rammed me in the ass as hard as he could -- and that's why I think "____ ____ SUCKS!!!"

Yeah, ____ ____ Sucks Big Green Ones, and everybody who heard me yelling was over thirty.

More later... _\,,/

One More Thing...

While I'm on a rant...

This is not a restaurant, if you'd like a cold drink, I'm cool with that, but don't leave your empty cans on the counter. I don't get paid enough to clean up after you, I sell parts -- my job does not involve having to bus tables, the tips just aren't good enough. Yeah, I bet the tips aren't good when you're in actual restaurants either, are they?

This is also not a daycare, if you'd like to bring your kids with you, I'm cool with that just as long as you make sure they've got shoes on and aren't gonna sh!t on the floor; but don't leave 'em in here for me to watch. Trust me, I'm not the person you want watchin' your kid(s), I'm just not.

Okay, that's it, I'll quit for now.
_\,,/

HoMeSkOoLeD?

Where else can you find an 8 or 12 year old riding a bike or razor scooter up to a fridge and standing there with the door open for ten minutes trying to decide between Dr Pepper and Mountain Dew?

I kept telling myself I wasn't gonna b!tch about that particular topic on the Blog, but it's what's on my mind, it's what's bothering me, it's what I wanna get off my chest.

I guess there are so many little gems of knowledge I've taken for granted due to the fact that My Mom is/was not like most Moms, and I was just raised different. As a toddler, in order to get to the driveway (because the tricycle is an outdoor toy) I rode the tricycle through the middle of the garage between a '72 Pantera and a Smokey-N-The-Bandit Trans-Am; and yes, even as a toddler, I knew better than to touch either one of 'em, 'cause ya just don't do that. The only time you touch a car is to get in, and you only touch the door handle; no rubbing, no fingering, no marking up the dust, no leaning, no sitting; we just don't do that. We just don't. So that's why I said "Hey, HEY!! Don't RUB that!" when I saw the younger one walkin' the length of the race trailer draggin' his hand against it. I'm sure he thinks I'm a real b!tch; just like the college friend who attempted to sit her ass on the hood of My Car, and just like the now-ex boyfriend who tossed his keys across the top of My Car. We just don't do that. We don't spray-paint on things just for the fun of spraying paint, we just don't. We don't open a second can of 'Dew when there's a half-full one still sittin' on the counter, we just don't. We don't run/stomp/be-as-loud-as-we-can when we know someone's on the phone, we just don't. We don't walk up and start talking while someone else is talking, we just don't do that...

It's probably not entirely a "HoMeSkOoLeD" thing, I'm sure part of it is a parenting thing; and I guess it's because not all parents are like My Mom. My Mom is one of those problem-solver kinda people (and I'll have ya know, I was real proud to hear Clay say that about Me), she'll do the stop-look-think thing and try to figure things out before asking any stupid questions. The Homeschool thing scares me because of some of the airhead things I've seen outta this bunch... I just worry that they're not raising Thinkers -- you can't teach a kid everything they'll ever need to know, you have to teach 'em how to figure things out.

Yesterday I got to hear the older boy plead his case to the folks about wanting a lighter, not that I understand why... Maybe the Fourth of July was still on his mind -- that was one of the things he mentioned, anyway. And the movie "Grease," ya know, with the biiiig flame... Younger one jumps in and says that "Mom says he's old enough to have one 'cause _____'s got one..." Apparently that's one of their little buddies from "Church." (Yeah, I put "Church" in quotes for a reason, you guessed it.) I was kinda shocked. I was even more shocked when the older one said "And _____'s dad goes to church..."

Uhm, So? So going to "Church" means you're automatically smart? Smart enough to let your 12 year old "buy a lighter?" You gotta be 18 to buy 'em at QuickTrip, so does that mean QT is the devil now since they're not making the same decisions as those "Church" people??? If you take a dump in a Cheeto bag, does it turn into a Cheeto? If you put a football into the oven, does it turn into a Ham? Showing up at "Church" doesn't turn you into a good parent.

And don't even get me started on those highschool football players who crashed 'cause they were shooting paintballs at each other at highway speed.

"We don't do that, we just don't."

Ology-Meme...

I get a kick outta the occasional "Meme," even though that word always makes me think of that damn dog that Charlene had... Eich. Eww. Eich. Eich.

Anyhow, I ripped this one offa Robin:


Meme-ology Meme

GRUB-OLOGY

What is your salad dressing of choice? I'm not a big salad eater, but I like Ranch dressing on several other things...

What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Taste-wise, I love Chik-Fil-A, but it seems high-priced & small-portioned. I'm also crazy about Sonic.

What is your favorite sit down restaurant? What a tough choice... South Of The Border (mom-n-pop Tulsa Tex-Mex joint), The Avalon Steakhouse (also a "Tulsa's Own"), Peppers Grill (chain-ish, not sure if they're anywhere other than here though)

On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant? I usually try for around 20%, more if everything's good, less if it's a crummy experience.

What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of it? The answer to that question is always subject to change, but I'm just crazy about chips & salsa.

Name three foods you detest above all others. Sushi (uncooked?? wtf???), Fried Alligator totally made me sick, and I know this is O-C-D-ish, but I can't stand bein' handed a plate with stuff mixed up too much. "Touching," I can handle, but I don't want gravy covering everything and I don't want corn juice makin' my fried chicken all mushy and un-crunchy.

What is your favorite dish to order in a Chinese restaurant? I Loooooove the Chinese Buffet, I'm crazy about all that crunchy-fried stuff down there on the end by the Sweet-n-Sour sauce, oh-my-my, Chicken and Shrimp and Sweet-n-Sour with those lovely Fried Biscuits!!!

What are your pizza toppings of choice? Meat, meat, cheese, more meat, more cheese... Like the Minute-Man's "Grand Slam (hold the jalapeno's)" Who knew a pizza with Polish Sausage on it could be soooo good?

What do you like to put on your toast? Butter & Cinnamon-Sugar, magical melty goodness... Mmmm...

What is your favorite type of gum? I've kinda stayed away from Gum lately, I've got this one tooth I'm kinda worried about.


TECH-OLOGY

Number of contacts in your cell phone? Oh Man. 492. But that's counting every number and e-mail address that's saved in there, and sometimes there's seven or eight for any given person or couple...

Number of contacts in your email address book? Uhhhmmm, I'm not sure since I ditched AOL & only moved the "important" ones, I haven't really looked.

What is the wallpaper on your computer? Right now, on this PC it's a bunch of Beads off of a body jewelry auction (viva Ebay!); on my iBook it's a whole bunch of pictures of "my people" that I put together on top of a shot of the downtown skyline over the Arkansas River...

What is your screensaver on your computer? A slideshow of baby animals.

Are there naked pictures saved on your computer? Not on this one, I'm at work!

How many landline phones do you have in your home? One old-old one that's just takin' up space on the desk, a cordless, and a cheapy for backup.

How many televisions are in your home? Two, I think...

What kitchen appliance do you use the least? I'm still tryin' to get off my lazy butt and try out that George Forman Grill.

What is the format of the radio station you listen to most?
NPR

How many sex toys do you own that require batteries? eHeh... More than I care to admit here! ;)


BI-OLOGY

What do you consider to be your best physical attribute? Hair. Duuuh. ;)

Are you right handed or left handed?
Right, there are only two tasks I can accomplish left-handed. ;)

Have you had anything removed from your body? Just a little sliver of broken-off kneecap.

Would you like to? Well, I need to get this tooth looked at, and I've got a couple moles I could part with.

Do you prefer to read when you go to the bathroom? Occasionally, but not always.

Which of your five senses do you think is keenest? Hmmmm... Vision, as long as I've got my contacts. ;)

When was the last time you had a cavity? Uhm, see also: "need to get tooth looked at"

What is the heaviest item you lift regularly? Well, my purse weighs a ton... And I'm sure there's some pretty heavy stuff that I've been carryin' in and out of the race trailer.

Have you ever been knocked unconscious? Uuuhhhm, I'm not sure, I might have, but I don't remember and I was already back up and walkin' around by the time the cops got there.


MISC-OLOGY

If it were possible, would you like to know the day you're going to die? I really don't think so...

If you could change your first name, what would you change it to? Naaaahhh, changing my e-mail address was enough of a hassle, I'll be fine.

How do you express your artistic side? I like to mess around with the website (html is "creativity," right?), I do a little writing, a little sewing when I have time, and I'm slowly learning to knit a little bit.

What color do you think you look best in? Uhhhm, I'm not sure.

How long do you think you could last in a medium security prison? I guess that depends on whether or not I'm gettin' my time's worth outta the crime. eHeh. Some crimes would be worth it, some would not.

Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake? Probably...

If we weren’t bound by society’s conventions, do you have a relative you would make a pass at? Hell Yeah! I've got a couple cousins who are pretty hot!! ;) Heh, Ain't that terrible??

How often do you go to church? I haven't been able to drag my boo-tay outta bed on a Sunday Morning since Racing Season started.

Have you ever saved someone’s life? Hmmm... Well, I've been told that I have, but who knows what would've happened.

Has someone ever saved yours? Yeah, probably the folks at the "Urgent Care" minor-emergency office...


DARE-OLOGY

For this last section, if you would do it for less or more money, indicate how much.

Would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street for $100,000? Maybe, depends on who all's around that area -- for all the hell I caught over showin' my tits to two close friends in the dark, in the pits at three AM, four hours after the races were over, I'd wanna know exactly who'd be there -- 'cause that ol' bitch still thinks it's somehow my fault her kids were riding their damn bicycles around out there in the dark, after midnight, unsupervised, at three AM, amongst trucks and trailers and God-knows-who... Yeah, it was all my fault just like if I'd whipped 'em out in the McD's playland at lunchtime. The saddest part? My good friend who was right next to me has red hair and waaaaay bigger tits, but this bitch didn't see her -- only me. And she just can't get enough of tellin' everybody about me showin' my tits to her kids. Not that her kids were out at three AM unsupervised, while she was over there standin' around doin' nothin' but lookin' for somethin' to bitch about -- it's just all about my tits... And hey, if she (or any of her oh-so-lovely family) are still stalkin' me on the 'net, "HOWDY, Y'ALL!!! HERE YA GO: (*)(*)," now kiss my ass, will ya?

Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100? Well, if she was clean-lookin', maybe, but no Skanks.

Would you have sex with a member of the same sex for $10,000? Nope, not a chance, I'm playin' the commitment card here... ;)

Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000? Hmmm... The money sounds good, but only for a surgical kinda thing, not like a swiss-army-knife kinda thing.

Would you never blog again for $50,000? Hmmm... I might need juuuuuust a little more money than that -- the blog has turned into a nice little "Outlet" for me.

Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000? Maybe... Might need a little more money on that one too -- I mean, it's not like a one-time Mardi-Gras Beads Flashing, it's printed on paper, somebody could find that magazine years and years from now.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000? I don't think so, I'm a bit of a wuss when it comes to actual hot sauce.

Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000? eHeh... Without fear of punishment? Does God buy into this non-punishment agreement? If so, I'll make a list...

Would you shave your head and get your entire body waxed for $5,000? No Feckin' Way. Not A Chance. Wax my entire body? Sure. My Head? Not A Chance. Nope.

Would you give up watching television for a year for $25,000? Well, if you can get that year in before the new season of O-T-H starts... ;) Do DVD's of Television count or can I still watch those? heehee!

It's Here!!!

And it's just adorable!!! I just got the BOOBIE SCARF from Robin's auction!!

I'll put a picture on the site soon...

An Update From The PC...

...Because I don't have the iBook with me today. I know, Excuses, Excuses, dammit. In my fit of craziness which involved satisfying my severe case of "Ragtop Fever," I left my iBook at Clay's house last night. I'm sure he'll bring it to me this afternoon -- I don't have the software or the files to do a twentycarlo.com update from this PC. Ah, but through the use-it-anywere magic of Blogger, I can put my mild little update here!

'Twas a reasonable weekend in spite of the anxious feelings in regard to finding a voicemail from the Dr's office Friday evening when it was too late to call back. Saturday night was a decent night of racing, even though we didn't get to stay for the Fireworks -- nothin' tore up, no crashes -- but don't think I didn't try. Good Gawd, that 6 car was as wide as the track; he went in high every time and was back to the edge of the infield before he'd even made it to the straightaway every time. Every. Time. I kept tryin' to get up there to where he'd have to let-up of take a passenger door, but I just couldn't ever quite get up there enough to bet in the gap and get by; and yeah, I do wish I had just a little more car. I couldn't get by honestly, but Russell made it by with a hallelujah-holy-shit pass through the infield, cut turn four by two tires and managed to get by, it was a hell of a show from where I was and I still wish I could've followed him through there but it didn't work out.

Yesterday we took the little white Merc out to ride around some, drove it out to Mounds to play in the pool -- and I'm soooo not gonna put it back 'til they scream and gripe and make me put it up. Ah, summertime... Ah, Ragtop Fever!!

Oh, and I'm watchin' the mailbox... I'll be sure to write about that (and post pictures) when it gets here. ;)

So... Just for the fun of it, how'bout a little "Meme" from Robin... The instructions said at least one, no more than three:

Song(s) That I Loathe to the Core of My Being:
1. That Toby Keith song about putting boots in asses ... I can't remember its name.
2. That other Toby Keith song about "talk about me"
3. "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy"
(yeah, I have a lot of "top-forty contry" loathing, heh.)

Artist(s) That I Loathe to the Core of My Being:
1. Toby Keith
2. Rob Zombie kinda gets on my nerves...
3. All those overkill-cookie-cutter-idol-freaks.

Rolling Stones Song(s) I Love:
1. "Memory Motel" (the one with Dave Matthews)
2. "Girl With Far Away Eyes"
3. "Wild Horses"

Beatles Song(s) I Love:
1. "Get Back"
2. "Come Together"


Who Song(s) I Love:
Uuuhhhmmm... I guess I don't particularly care for The Who.

Reggae Song(s) I Love:
Uhm, this is bad, but I can't think of any titles... I remember hearin' some cool reggae tunes, but I don't remember much else.

Country Song(s) I Love:
1. "Last Thing I Needed First Thing This Morning" - Willie Nelson
2. "Gallo Del Cielo" - Joe Ely (I could put a buuuuunch of ol' Joe on here)
3. "Kentucky Wildcat" - The Kentucky Headhunters

Movie Soundtrack(s) I Love:
1. "Dazed & Confused" (Both CD's)
2. "Wayne's World"
3. "South Of Heaven, West Of Hell"

Musical soundtrack(s) I Love:
1. "Phantom Of The Opera"
2. "Cats"
3. "Les Miserables" (All three because we played 'em in Marching Band)

Cover Song(s) I Love:
1. James McMurtry & Joe Ely - "Ole Slewfoot"
2. Bruce Springsteen - "My Ride's Here"
3. The Del McCoury Band - "Vincent Black Lightning, 1952"

Contemporary Top-40 Artist(s) I Secretly Love:
Honestly, I just don't have any answers for this one...

Song(s) That Bring Me to Tears:
1. Macy Gray - "Sweet Sweet Baby" (For David)
2. Norah Jones - "Wurlitzer Prize" (Same as above, and yeah, it's a cover too)
3. Brooks & Dunn - "Why Did I Say Goodbye" (Yeah, all that cryin' comes from the same place, oddly enough)
3.5. "Keep Me In Your Heart For a While" from the Warren Zevon Tribute CD (only three, only three)

Song(s) That Make Me Shake My Ass:
1. Macy Gray's "A Moment To Myself" (among others)
2. Southern Culture's "Twistin' On A Red Hot Spike" (Stripper Song! Yeah, Baby!)
3. (I hate like hell to admit it, but) Afroman's "She Won't Let Me..." (It shakes my ass and cracks my ass up!!)

Classical Composer(s) I Love:
Maurice Ravel
John Barnes Chance
Alfred Reed
Frank Ticheli
(wait, wait, have to stop at three!)

Rap/Hip-Hop Song(s) I Love:
1. That hip-hop B-side version of The Rolling Stones "Love Is Strong" (wish I could find another copy of that)
2. Macy Gray's "Gimme All Your Lovin' (or I Will Kill U and Cry When You're Dead)
3. The Black-Eyed Peas (With Macy) - "Request Line"

70s Disco Song(s) I Love:
Uhm, Fleetwood Mac's "You Make Lovin' Fun" has always seemed disco-y to me...

70s Supergroup Song(s) I Love:
1. Define "supergroup". Umm ... "Freebird" - Lynyrd Skynyrd (yeah, I left Robin's answer there)
2. The Cult's "Fire Woman"
3. Was Foghat considered a "Supergroup?" I loooove "Stay With Me"

Metal Song(s) I Love:
1. AC-DC's "Ballbreaker"
2. Metallica's "Ronnie"
3. Buckcherry's "Lit Up" (also, "Ridin'," I know, stop at three, stop at three!)

New Wave Song(s) I Love:
Uuuhhhmmm... I don't think I have any answers for that one either...

Soul/R&B Song(s) I Love:
I can only think of one, "At Last" by Etta James, does that count?

Power Ballad(s) I Love:
The only ones I can think of are ones I hate. Not a favorite genre of mine ... Let's pretend I love "Home Sweet Home" by Motley Crue, okay? (uh, yeah, me too)


Pre 1950s Song(s) I Love:
I can't think of anything pre-50's, I guess I ain't been payin' attention...

Punk Song(s) I Love:
Does German Techno count as Punk here? I didn't think so...

Singer/Songwriter Song(s) I Love:
1. J.J. Cale - "Magnolia"
2. John Bell (Widespread Panic) - "Longer Look"
3. James McMurtry - "Choctaw Bingo"

MTV Video(s) I Love:
Like I ever get to watch MTV.

Songs To Have Sex To:
1. Southern Culture's "Twistin' On A Red Hot Spike"
2. Fleetwood Mac's "Tusk"
3. The Rolling Stones "Sister Morphine" (Yeah, odd, I know, but I stuck with just three on the Stones question, so it was on my mind)

Guilty Pleasures:
Dirty Billy-Bob fantasies, even though his CD's kinda make me feel like makin' fun of him...